The Hawks Family Circus: Longing for Now

Most days as a of Mom of four are crazy. And in those crazy moments that happen throughout each day, it is so easy to wish for the next stage, the next month, the next age. Because it would be easier then, they'll listen better then, they'll actually clean up then. But, when I look past the crazy and watch what my four kids are up to, I can't help but smile. So, the babies are into everything, but watching them get into everything is so cute. They are so curious. And playful. And imaginative. They are so fun!

In the midst of the craziness that is my life, I am choosing to long for now. I am taking note of what the four are up to and letting it sink in. I am *trying* to enjoy the mess ... and the chaos ... and the noise ... because with that comes the memories, laughter, creative play, and tons of fun.

Sadie is our little lover. She can't get enough snuggles throughout the day. She loves to grab a few of her favorite toys (play food and babies) and sit on my lap to play with them. She can't go more than five minutes without giving me a kiss or tickling me. There is nothing sweeter than when she stops drinking her bottle for a few moments so that she can give you a kiss. She does not enjoy being tickled very much, but she LOVES to tickle others. She says "ticka-ticka-ticka" in the cutest little baby girl voice as she tickles you. Sadie will spontaneously say "I love you" (nothing melts a Mama's heart more!) and has great manners (she says: please, thank you, and 'welcome without reminders!). Sadie loves to talk and is definitely an extrovert. Sadie is aggressive and will fight for what she wants. She steals toys, hits, bites, and throws fits when she doesn't get her way. The big kids stand up to her, but Sammy always gives in to Sadie. She will share if you ask her to, but she'll often cry after she gives her toy to someone else to play with. Sadie loves going potty on the big girl potty and will tell us when she needs to go. If we weren't still giving her a bottle before bed, I would probably potty train her right now. But, for now, we'll let her go potty when she feels like it and not put any pressure on her for more.

Listening to Sammy and Sadie talk together is adorable. They definitely have their own language and seem to understand each other. Sadie also seems to feel for Sammy. Almost anytime Sammy cries, Sadie cries too. It is very sweet. And they both seem to come to each others "rescue." They stand up for each other, comfort each other, and check in with each other when one of them is upset.

Sammy is a flirt. If he catches you smiling at him, he's got the biggest grin on his face. He is much more conservative with his kisses than his twin sister. But, when he does give you a kiss, they are pure sweetness. He sticks that bottom lip out as far as it can go when he puckers up. Sammy winks when he's flirting or teasing and has already learned to whistle. He loves playing with me. He comes up to me and says, "Mama, Mama" and grabs my hand to take me to the toy he wants to play with. He loves playing cars (he'll drive pretty much any toy around as a car), pretend play in the kitchen, and going for walks outside. He also loves building with blocks and megablocks. And he's very proud of his creations. Whenever he builds something, he finds me so he can show it to me and grins from ear to ear when I say, "great job" or "I love it." Sammy is more adventurous when it comes to food than Sadie is. He'll try just about anything -- most of it comes right back out, but at least he tries, right?!? :) He's becoming a great eater. He seems to understand much of what we say to him or ask of him and nods his head to acknowledge us in conversation. He absolutely loves his big brother and already looks up to him.

Michael and Liliana have become two peas in a pod since the twins came home. It's almost as if they are defending their territory as "first children" together against the twins. They play together so much more now and fight a ton less. They love playing hide-and-go-seek, doing art projects, playing church, having dance parties, building forts, and playing in the snow (which apparently we're going to continue to do in April!?!?). They look out for each other and seem to genuinely enjoy each others company. They've gotten wise in their "old age" and know when to ask Mommy for a treat so that she'll say yes (ha!). And Michael has learned to send Liliana to ask for something if it's really crazy because I must say yes to her more often. :)

Life is hard and crazy at moments, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I love having four kids and couldn't imagine life without any of them. Even if they do produce a ton of crumbs that seem to keep re-appearing no matter how often I sweep. But sweeping the crumbs brings me joy now because I know who made them. Okay, maybe that's not entirely true....but I'm getting there. :)