I have two choices this morning. I can be mad, upset, frustrated, freak out or I can praise God for the wait. Okay, let's just be honest here. I've already done both. We didn't hear (AGAIN!) from the Embassy this morning. I didn't sleep well because I kept waking up to check my email, pray, freak out, finally fall back asleep, repeat. At one point, Matt asked me what was wrong and I told him I was really frustrated we hadn't heard anything yet. He promptly started to pray. I was relieved he was on my side, but then he started to pray that I would have a peace and know that it's in God's timing and I don't need to worry. Um, Matt, wrong prayer. You should be begging God to move mountains so we can travel this weekend. But, that's not what I needed last night. I needed peace and I praise God for a husband who can see beyond my craziness to pray for what I really need.
Alright, so back to my decision. After much prayer and consideration (ha!) I came to the conclusion that I need to praise God for the wait. It is a very hard thing for me to do. Very hard. So, in order to help me along I decided I should make a list of reasons I'm grateful for the wait.
1. I get to spend special time with Michael and Liliana
2. Matt and I have been able to do lots of extra projects around the house (we are re-hauling our mudroom right now... I can't wait to post pictures when it's done!)
3. I am learning a much deeper level of trust in Christ. Sammy and Sadie are first and foremost HIS children. He is giving us the honor of raising them. If my love runs so deep for them it sometimes hurts because they are not with me, how much more does Jesus love them and desire good things for them?
4. I've made some amazing friends who are also waiting for their adopted children to come home. We've bonded over our longing (okay, sometimes obsessing) for our kids to come home.
5. We get to continue "life as normal" for a while longer. When the twins come home, we'll be stepping out of volunteer roles, doing less outside activities, and having a more structured schedule. For now, we get to continue those.
6. I can continue sleeping in while Michael and Liliana play on their own in the mornings. :)
I am sure I could think of a dozen more reasons why I'm grateful for the wait. But for now, these six will get me through the day. Until tonight when I turn into a crazy Mom and stay up all night long again waiting for that coveted Embassy email. Okay, maybe it's not that drastic and maybe tonight it won't be another so stressful (because I'm praising God for the wait). But for now, I'm praying for peace for today, for tonight, and for the remainder of the wait.
Alright, so back to my decision. After much prayer and consideration (ha!) I came to the conclusion that I need to praise God for the wait. It is a very hard thing for me to do. Very hard. So, in order to help me along I decided I should make a list of reasons I'm grateful for the wait.
1. I get to spend special time with Michael and Liliana
2. Matt and I have been able to do lots of extra projects around the house (we are re-hauling our mudroom right now... I can't wait to post pictures when it's done!)
3. I am learning a much deeper level of trust in Christ. Sammy and Sadie are first and foremost HIS children. He is giving us the honor of raising them. If my love runs so deep for them it sometimes hurts because they are not with me, how much more does Jesus love them and desire good things for them?
4. I've made some amazing friends who are also waiting for their adopted children to come home. We've bonded over our longing (okay, sometimes obsessing) for our kids to come home.
5. We get to continue "life as normal" for a while longer. When the twins come home, we'll be stepping out of volunteer roles, doing less outside activities, and having a more structured schedule. For now, we get to continue those.
6. I can continue sleeping in while Michael and Liliana play on their own in the mornings. :)
I am sure I could think of a dozen more reasons why I'm grateful for the wait. But for now, these six will get me through the day. Until tonight when I turn into a crazy Mom and stay up all night long again waiting for that coveted Embassy email. Okay, maybe it's not that drastic and maybe tonight it won't be another so stressful (because I'm praising God for the wait). But for now, I'm praying for peace for today, for tonight, and for the remainder of the wait.
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